STEP 1: Position yourself in the midst of a tangled stand of dead cedar trees in 18 inches of snow.
STEP 2: Fire up the ol’ chain saw.
STEP 3: Begin to saw down said stand of dead cedars.
STEP 4: Hold chain saw precariously in one hand while directing the fall of the trees with the other.
STEP 5: Get careless with said chain saw and let it ever so lightly brush against the side of your thigh pant-leg.
STEP 6: After a fruitless but terrifying wait for blood to begin to gush from said leg you've now got yourself a pair of jeans with annoying store-bought-looking holes in them. Enjoy!